There are times I wish that there were names of genres that are often found in films. Maybe there are, but I just don’t know them. So I’ll pick my own name for films that center on someone who is isolated from the people around him or her, but in time finds a way to connect with others. Let’s call it the “no man is an island” genre. A great example of this would be The Station Agent. The Grocer’s Son is another worthwhile example.
Antoine is for the most part on his own. He left home ten years ago with a great deal of bad feelings for everyone. He has a couple of friends, but even these he keeps at a distance. His relationship with his girlfriend is basically platonic. He can’t keep a job because he can’t get along with people. So he drifts aimlessly.
When his father has a heart attack, Antoine goes to the hospital, but can’t bring himself to go into his father’s room. His parents run a mom-and-pop grocery store in rural France. Some people come by the store, but most get their groceries from Antoine’s father driving his route to all the people in the area. Elderly people especially need this service. So while his father recuperates, Antoine agrees to come home (he’s just lost another job) and help his mother.
Antoine is terrible at interpersonal skills. He doesn’t understand how to be friendly to customers. He is brusque. He seems to be in far more of a hurry than his customers. He doesn’t really want to get to know them. His plan is to help for a while and then head back to the city.
Luckily he has brought his girlfriend Claire with him. She smoothes things out. She gets on people’s good side. In time Antoine and the customers get to know each other, and in that connection both the customers and Antoine find that they are more than they could be alone.
But it isn’t only the customers that Antoine needs to connect with. He has been estranged from his family for ten years. He can’t stand to be back in his little town. He tells Claire, “It reeks of death around here.” In reality the stench may be the deadness that is within him. The isolation that Antoine has built up must come down if he is to find any happiness or fulfillment. He has managed to keep Claire at arm’s length, but if she goes off to university in Spain he will be totally alone.
Perhaps to look at it as “no man is an island” doesn’t really give credit to the importance of community. The same community that Antoine found stifling ten years ago is the same one that ultimately becomes his life. He learns the idiosyncrasies of these people. He knows their pains and their needs. He even begins to worry what will happen to them when he is gone.
It is when people share in each other’s lives that we discover that connection to the mainland than reminds us that we are part of a community. Without that community, we will perhaps never find any real happiness in life.
The issue of finding happiness and fulfillment is central to the biblical wisdom literature (such Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, James and some writings in the Apocrypha). While those writings are often addressed to individual living, they all presuppose life in community. They understand that the happiness we seek will only be found when we are connected to others.
Such wisdom is still needed, even in the internet age. The internet allows us to connect with so many people, especially with the advent of networking sites. But it also allows us to keep those we interact with at a distance. We may never meet the people we call friends. Community is more than just being a name on someone’s friends list. It means we need to be able to touch others lives, and be touched in return.
July 26th, 2008 at 8:54 am
I appreciate especially your last paragraph, Darrel. I think many of us who grew up in church have learned to put on a face on Sundays and not really connect with people. The Internet has made non-connecting connections even easier. Thanks for the reminder. This is something I need to be working on constantly.