I’m trying to figure out who Bride Wars was made for. Ostensibly a chick flick, the film features two best friends—Liv and Emma (Kate Hudson and Anna Hathaway)—who grew up dreaming and planning their dream wedding. Due to a clerical error in the office of their wedding planner, Marion St. Claire (Candice Bergen), the two end up booked at the same place on the same day at the same time.
It’s an exercise in banality, air-headedness, and vacuity all presented as charming farce. If some women relate to it, well, I’m sure the show Bridezillas does fill a demographic.
“Look at them. So blissfully unaware of the implications of their wedding date.” –St. Claire
As a guy, I often wonder: what’s the point of huge weddings? Actually, they don’t even have to be huge, but that doesn’t make them any less stressful. Rehearsals. Wedding coordinators. Bridesmaids dresses. Hair. Make-up. Weather (for outdoor weddings). Cakes. Toasts. First dances. Parent-child dance. Reception food. Music. Ending with people saying “Whew! Glad that’s over.” And this is for a simpler wedding. Did I mention the stress? The stress that turns the woman you love into a “bridezilla.” The stress that pits family member against family member (who’s paying for what; who does what; who’s responsible, or supposed to be responsible, for what?). The stress stemming from women planning their dream day from when they are little girls.
It becomes about the spectacle.
Part of this comes back to the downside of our ideas of romance. However, sometimes I wonder if we’ve missed the point of what wedding ceremonies are supposed to be about. It’s about coming together with your community—friends, family, church—to swear before them and God to become husband and wife. The community is both witness and participant (not gift givers and food consumers), pledging to be a part of the couple’s lives and to support the marriage. The ceremony symbolizes God’s relationship with us, a mystical union. And it’s about celebrating with friends and family as the couple begins a new life together.
There is good ritual and there is empty ritual. Good rituals help us to tell and remember the story being ritualized. It is a symbol meant to point us back to what is being symbolized. Empty ritual is strictly for show, one to please others or because others want you to do something. We have no idea why we’re even doing them, so we’re just going through the motions. Since there is power in ritual, it’s important to get the ritual right.
So, anyway, this big pile of clichés strung together by mediocre dialogue is okay. A little shrill, but better than it should be due to the charm of the actresses.
